Subtlety is not an option.
Girl on bus: Who are you trick-or-treating with?
13-year-old boy: I'm trick-or-treating with GIRLS!
[Later, explaining]
13YOB: It's like a boys' night out, with girls.
Girl: [in a "blonde" accent] Oh my God, you guys, my birthday is like in three days. And like, I'm getting my prom dress from Nebraska, y'know? It's like... like red, and wrinkled but in a stylish way. But I don't know if I can get it, 'cause it's like $200, and, I just don't know, y'guys...
Math class girl: Oh my God, why do you even do any work in here if you have all these games on the calculator.
Math class boy: Because I wanna go to college.
MCG: That's stupid.
MCB: And get a good job.
MCG: You won't.
MCB: Why?
MCG: You don't know how to.
MCB: You're stupid.
Girl in study hall, talking to a friend: I don't understand how this boy could be cute as f%*^ and boring as hell!
A well-written biography will just light up the world for me.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Sunday, November 16, 2008
The square root of 64 is eight...
Guy 1: Do you know the etymology of that word?
Guy 2: What's that?
Guy 1: It's like, why that word became.
It's almost time! I'm almost out of chocolate!
1: ...No?
2: He said it was too big.
1: Do you realize what you're losing?
2: ...superintendent of schools don't care... do away with the position.
Dyed Blonde Girl: So I have [name] sleeping over at my house tonight. You could come over then, but I dunno if you'd want to...
Guy 2: What's that?
Guy 1: It's like, why that word became.
It's almost time! I'm almost out of chocolate!
1: ...No?
2: He said it was too big.
1: Do you realize what you're losing?
2: ...superintendent of schools don't care... do away with the position.
Dyed Blonde Girl: So I have [name] sleeping over at my house tonight. You could come over then, but I dunno if you'd want to...
Thursday, November 6, 2008
63 Strangers Hugged
[After three-person group hug]
Girl: It's Hug A Stranger Day!
Boy: He's not a stranger!
Girl: I don't know who he is!
Girl: We're just gonna get like a fry.
Guy 1: Barry Manilow's gonna be on my team.
Guy 2: But that's awesome!
Girl 1: So was she in the box?
Girl 2: ... We stopped by the mirror and she pulled out a clump of her hair.
1: I was good at math when...
2: When it was just numbers.
[laughter]
1: They took me out of the dumb class with all my friends and put me in the smart class with all my enemies.
Boy: That's why he's wearing yellow!
Girl: Everybody always wears blue!
1: I wore my Uggs today. I feel special.
2: It's not even that cold out.
1: I usually wear my flip-flops until the second day after it starts snowing.
Can you feel my presence? 'Cause I'm right there. Do you feel it? I'm right there.
Girl: It's Hug A Stranger Day!
Boy: He's not a stranger!
Girl: I don't know who he is!
Girl: We're just gonna get like a fry.
Guy 1: Barry Manilow's gonna be on my team.
Guy 2: But that's awesome!
Girl 1: So was she in the box?
Girl 2: ... We stopped by the mirror and she pulled out a clump of her hair.
1: I was good at math when...
2: When it was just numbers.
[laughter]
1: They took me out of the dumb class with all my friends and put me in the smart class with all my enemies.
Boy: That's why he's wearing yellow!
Girl: Everybody always wears blue!
1: I wore my Uggs today. I feel special.
2: It's not even that cold out.
1: I usually wear my flip-flops until the second day after it starts snowing.
Can you feel my presence? 'Cause I'm right there. Do you feel it? I'm right there.
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