68 Life-Loving Wasps

I swear I'm not talking about you. Even though I'm pointing at you, it doesn't mean anything.

He is so game on!

You have a lot of love of life for a wasp.

You sound pretty scourged at the moment.

Why don't you use biobuthenal? Then you can make all the noise you want!

1: He loves to eat, right?
2: Yeah, that's one of the good things about him. A bike ride would be a great idea.

Wouldn't it be funny if you died on a Monday?

It looked nice on the dummy, but it doesn't look nice on me.

Why would I have chocolate at a time like this?

The square root of 64 is eight...

Guy 1: Do you know the etymology of that word?
Guy 2: What's that?
Guy 1: It's like, why that word became.

It's almost time! I'm almost out of chocolate!

1: ...No?
2: He said it was too big.

1: Do you realize what you're losing?
2: ...superintendent of schools don't care... do away with the position.

Dyed Blonde Girl: So I have [name] sleeping over at my house tonight. You could come over then, but I dunno if you'd want to...

30 Jack-O-Lanters

I hate really smart people.

Oh, God. If I forgot it I will personally hurt myself.

Mrs. [Teacher] put two Tootsie Rolls on everybody's desk. I got there before everyone and grabbed them all!

...At the end he got sprayed with this poisonous gas by the aliens...

Man in NASCAR jacket: She did meticulous work on this car- [pronounced "cahh"]
Woman: [interrupting] My God, you should see the car! [pronounced "cahh"]

Number Nine *John Lennon's voice echoes...*

Angelface...[NAME]... looked like a munchkin!
[Laughter]

[Beep beep] WAKE UP!

*British accent* It makes a delicious mixture.
*American accent* Wait, where's the chocolate?
*British accent* Oh, it's already mixed in.

I heard the first one walking into a CVS, the second one while waiting at a red light, and the third one at a really good cafe.