59 Teacherly One-Liners and Escalator Guys...

There's no games in biology!

Geography is not destiny, but geography influences destiny.

I don't speak silence.

Live and learn, or die.

Of course you're gonna play me. That's how we are.

It smells like a preschool. Seriously, smell it!

That's all right, you laugh like a girl. Nothing perjorative, girls.

It's multi-tastic.

Yo, Shrek the Third is my [stuff]!

Anne Hutchinson, she's my favorite!

Jamie doesn't sabe!

I say mathemagical because there are some people who are like, "Where do these crazy mathematicians get these things?"

Your cats are cute. Lemme get one.

It's just a concious thing, like how the hundred-dollar wines taste better.

I hate the library! Librarians scare me!

I can tell what a Porsche is!

That [stuff]'s mad goofball, yo, for real.

The end is coming! How exciting!

You don't smell in science.

No, it was the third day. That's when I realized, "Lady, you need some psychological help."

You look like a young Wesley Snipes. It's a good thing.

I'm more of an escalator guy.

Year A.D. 43 Started on a Tuesday!

Girl, talking on cell phone: Do you have tweezers at your house? [listens] 'Cause I gotta pluck my eyebrows!


Boy: [sings] All my friends say of course it's gonna get better.
Girl: Oh my god! That song was stuck in my head when I was walking away.


Girl: Who fails all their tests? [Her name] does!

Girl 1: ...Scotch tape.
Girl 2: Scotch tape?
Girl 3: Why would you use that?
Girl 1: My boyfriend...

Guy 1: Do you want to go to the library?
Guy 2: I don't wanna go to the library 'cause we have to be quiet and I don't feel like being quiet.

Guy, pointing out places on girl's face: ... patch of redness here, a patch of redness here, and a patch of redness here.

Girl: She's smart, she's just not a good teacher!
Teacher: I thought you liked her! Oh! Then I'm not going to be in on your running joke on her!

Student 1: How did you do?
Student 2: Awesome! It was the easiest test of life!