Number Six

Alice laughed. "There's no use trying," she said: "one can't believe impossible things."

"I daresay you haven't had much practice," said the Queen. "When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."


Oh, I think I can see my house from up here.

Now, with the truth of his past revealed to him, Thor must struggle with not only his destiny, but also his detention.

What do you think this is, wood shop?

Number Five

McCain, we have so many things the same
I walk with a cane, you have cain in your name.

If you have superpowers, why are you taking the elevator?
My superpowers only come out at night.
Oh, really?
Yeah, They're nocturnal.

Yeah, we're twins.
What kind?
Well, we could either be identical or nocturnal.

Number Four

{Orange light from a digital camera is seen on a girl's arm before a photo is taken.]

"OhMyGod! OhMyGod! I'm going to die! SOMEONE IS TRYING TO KILL ME!!" [Screams and runs a few feet away behind a tree]

[walks over to the tree] "What are you talking about?!!?"

" I was almost killed by a orange laser!!!!!! I saw my life flash before my eyes!"

[Laughter]
"That was the camera. It means the flash was on and it detects a person."

"Oh." [goes and hits camera person]
"You scared the sugar crispies out of me!"

[Laughter] "Sorry 'bout that."

Number Three

"I don't think the Wicked Witch of the West rode a Harley Davidson!" [Laughter]

Number Two

Oh my god what’s wrong with you?!
Exorcism no comments yet
What?
I have this weird friend who posts stuff on her blog.
Yeah this is the exactly the kind of stuff I’m looking for!
[laughter]
It’s a dream it’s about this cat who like wants to commit suicide or something and like… it’s like the exorcism, and she’s like “I hope I never go to sleep sad again” it’s like wicked weird!

I was going to print it out yesterday but we had that, like… duff come
Yeah. Each breath I take… I think you want to say “feels”
Oh, what did I…?
“Feel”

He looks like a Chia pet!
[laughter]
It's true!

Number One

Just so you know, the first sound bite is a fictionalized account of something that allegedly happened. The rest is pretty much directly what happened. -Maria

Sound Bites

He examined me through the Froot Loop, his left eye squinting slightly as he watched with his right, yakking about putting gasoline in a boat the whole time. I didn’t, like, really get it or whatever, and it was totally weird that he was using the Froot Loop as a telescope, I mean, wtf is that all about? I don’t have a freakin’ boat, so I don’t need to freakin’ know how to freakin’ change freakin’ gasoline in a freakin’ boat!

Basically, I post everything "it" -- fashion, makeup, beauty, clothes, stores, books, celebrity gossip, TV, music ... etc. I am proud to have a mindless pop culture blog -- no haters please!

“Na na na na, na na na na, hey hey hey, goodbye!” I wish they would pipe down a bit, as they are trying my patience. Why do they find the need to foul the air with their off-key voices?

Aw… that sounds like a Disney movie!

That’s scary but I think that at the end you should reveal what you are talking about… just a thought. :)

This time around you/ Hit a goose on the butt/ And made a par

Hehe, nice imagery. But the poor goose! :) Lol!

“How to Hug a Baby? What’s that?”
“Oh, it’s funny.”
“Squirrel Management Technique?”
“Oh, this is really funny.”

dont take it the wrong way i dont cut myself or anything i just really like the metaphor

“’Star Wars Galaxies- Chapter 6: Masters of the Wild’?”
“I don’t even know why I have that.”
“Aww, that’s a cute one. I hope they know their dog is mauling their child.”
“It’s hugging the baby, obviously!”

“Any time you have more questions, feel free to ask.”
“Okay, I’ll do that.”

“No, you’re not getting the picture one now that I finally got one!” [laughter]
“Omigod, what the heck?”
“Hi, Mackenzie.”
“That makes no sense.”
“Are you even doing anything?”
“Not really…”
“Mackensie?”
“Well, I don’t know how to spell her name!”
“We go together… wait, what?”
“I’m like so bored.”

“Ladies and gentlemen, headphones off, clean the peanut butter out of your ears, eyes up here.”

“Wow, that’s funny.”
I know… :)

“No, Parker, why do you want that? They cost like fifteen dollars!”